To Label or Not to Label Reflection Paper on Totoy Guro’s Special Education Labels in the Philippines

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Totoy Guro is a blog written by a Filipino teacher. It is a personal space on the Internet where he shares his insights, notes and personal experiences as an educator in the Philippines. The article listing Totoy Guro’s reasons for espousing the use of “labels” for children with special needs (CSN) is a good insight from a teacher’s perspective. Totoy Guro enumerated that using labels for CSN strengthens the teachers’ roles because labels identify the exceptional students’ needs in the classrooms. He also opposed the use of euphemisms for exceptionalities as this prevents people from truly understanding what needs understanding. He said euphemisms promote gossips and unfair labels among children, parents and even teachers. Instead, he recommended public and classroom discussions to educate everyone about exceptionalities.

Reading about students’ exceptionalities and special education (SPED) has opened my mind about the topic. The most experience and knowledge I have about it was a special classroom in my high school where the lone SPED teacher conducted lessons to students with disabilities. These students joined their class the same way regular students would, but gathered daily in the SPED room long after the regular students have gone home. Inside that room was a mystery unknown and uninteresting to me until now. 

Totoy Guro’s piece on using labels gave me an overview of what regular students, CSN, parents and teachers stand about exceptionalities. SPED and exceptionalities are facts of life everyone should accept, deal and live with respectfully of one another. As a parent and future educator, I know that having correct diagnosis of students’ learning disabilities is beneficial for the concerned student, parent and family of the student and most especially, the teacher. It is the start of addressing the necessary accommodations, therapy and changes in order to make the CSN succeed at school.

Totoy Guro has freely used the term label to mean this diagnosis. However, I understand also the possible negative reaction of those who oppose the use of labels for the stigma and wrong connotations they give. The same way that our society today has opted for politically correct phrases and terminologies in order to appease people groups coming from diverse backgrounds and concerns. Adopting politically correct phrases though is synonymous to watering down the issue, if not totally evading it. The problems with using labels then is miscommunication and lack of respect for those who are different from us. Job 6:25 KJV says, “How forcible are right words! but what doth your arguing reprove?” Right words set us towards the correct path. Arguments divide people, familites and societies. We need and deserve truth all the time, but we need to serve it with love, respect, understanding and encouragement all the time too.

Reference/s

T. G. (2011, September 3). MY LIST WHY “LABELS” FOR CHILDREN WITH SPECIAL NEEDS ARE GOOD [Web log post]. Retrieved June 19, 2016, from https://totoyguro.wordpress.com/2011/09/03/my-list-why-labels-for-children-with-special-needs-are-good/#comments

Notes on Elisabeth Elliot's Love has a Price Tag

Elisabeth Elliot - missionary, mom, author

I first knew about Elisabeth Elliot from the movie Through Gates of Splendor. It documented their missionary days in a remote jungle in Ecuador and how their husbands were killed by the Auca people whom they have been praying for to share the gospel with - their husbands of barely five years.

Their story convinced me more to seek God's kingdom and live my life for Him.

Keep a Quiet Heart
Then I came across my sister's book written by Elisabeth, Keep a Quiet Heart. It is a compilation of writings on various topics like family, faith, even social issue commentaries. I read it three times from cover to cover and has been greatly blessed with her views and messages. Googled her and found out about her website which featured daily devotionals - http://www.elisabethelliot.org/.

It was sad to know she has stopped writing and speaking. She is a great blessing to the country of America, even to the world. So I decided to support her by getting another book: Love Has a Price Tag: Inspiring Stories That Will Open Your Heart to Life's Little Miracles. It will definitely not be the last book I will read by her.

Notes on Love Has a Price Tag

The purpose of life is to know God Photo credit:PraisePhotography.com

1. The purpose of life is to know God - we do this on our own. Others may point us closer to Him, yet the experience is all unique for every individual, personal.
2. When God made man, He made him in His own image. When He made the animals, His imagination roamed wide and free - The Adventures of Toby is an animation series that is not only top quality but parent approved.
3. If we give out love, there is ultimately no way on heaven or earth to avoid receiving and receiving far more than we could possibly give.
4. Life is full of things we can't do anything about, but which we are supposed to do so mething with. - My take on this, my son's special needs in class is NOT a problem but a purpose - to improve myself, that I may be able to love them more, and learn to trust God more.
5. Prayer is like incense. It costs a great deal. It doesn't seem to accomplish much (as we mortals assess things). It soon dissipates but God likes the smell.
6. Let thanksgiving be the habit of your life
7. God has no problems only plans. Corrie Ten Boom

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Music Time Activity, Kids' Schedule and Routine

Dev-pedia recommends having routines to help our little boy. I've always wanted to have a family schedule. Attempted to implement several ones too but failed. Until today.

Kids' daily schedule on the wall

Kids' routine
Using four pieces of A4 board paper, I made a table with two columns and about 12 rows and provided blank spaces for the kids to write in their names on top. I have identified these activities:

1. Building Time - play with blocks, tinkertoys
2. Tech Time - wii games, ipad or TV
3. Music time - piano lessons, musical activities/crafts, making happy noise
4. Outdoor time - play outside, stroll to pick up rocks/leaves/feathers/flowers
5. Sports and fitness time - swim, jog, exercise, dance
6. Art time - paint, color, draw, mold clay
7. Reading time - books and handwriting practice

Breakfast, morning and afternoon snacks as well as lunch and dinner have been keyed in by me. Bed time too. I left an extra hour for own time where they may do whatever they choose, as long as they only ask for dad/mom's help for a maximum of three times. Plus, all toys used during own time need to be packed away on their own.

So far so good. :)

Music time activity
First activity on my list is to build our own drums out of cans then use it to play along with our favorite songs.

Dr. Marc Reysio-Cruz of Capitol Medical City, Occupational Therapy in QC

Incredibooth time with the kids

Carlos' teacher told me that he may need a special education teacher since he has a hard time focusing and is hyperactive. A meeting with his teachers and the guidance counselor who evaluated him ended with a list of developmental pedia to consider.

I went with the nearest choice who was Dr. Reysio-Cruz. A parent-friend told me that he used to be a member of college-based organization Campus Crusade for Christ. Dr. Reysio-Cruz is also part of Headway School for Giftedness in Quezon City.

Developmental Pedia
It turns out that it's costly to consult with a dev-ped. A consultation ranged from P3,000 to P3,500 per session according to the Quezon City-based dev ped list given to me by his school. Their clinic's schedule is also very full. The earliest booking I got was three weeks after I called to be booked, only because I live near and the secretary's willing to put me in once a client backs out.

Fortunately, Carlos was seen two weeks after I asked for a schedule. One dev-ped clinic I called said their earliest vacancy is three months from the time I called.

However, when we got to the clinic of Dr. Reysio-Cruz, I was informed that he had an emergency meeting so another doctor will check Carlos. She was Dr. Jocelyn Sanchez of St. Luke's. She asked me questions about my pregnancy with Carlos along with his growing years. She would like to know the quirks I find about my little boy. I said he's more energetic compared with other boys and tends to focus on some tasks he prefers.

Dr. Jocelyn S. Sanchez - MD, Nuerodevelopmental Pediatrics
St. Lukes Medical Arts Bldg. Rm 533 Tuesdays and Saturdays 2-6PM by appointment
Telephone: 723-0101 local 6533

Diagnosing ADHD in 5-year olds
Aftewards, she had a one-on-one session with Carlos.

1. She made him do some block creations after she has built them. I heard she asked Carlos to build a bridge. 
2. Then it was time to do physical activities, like standing on one foot for some seconds, hopping, throwing and catching a tennis ball.
3. She asked Carlos to write.
4. She also showed Carlos photos and asked him about what he saw. Carlos had to describe the activities, relationships of the people in the photo. He was also asked to name all that he can see there.
5. She asked what Carlos' birthday was, where he lives, the name of his best friend. I would hear him answer confidently, but when the questions went to what he would do if he's tired or cold, his voice turned soft.

All the time, she was writing her notes.

Borderline ADHD with occupational therapy sessions
Aftewards, Carlos came out of the room and told me it was finish. I was called back in so she may explain her findings.

She said Carlos did well in the test though he would squirm in his place whether he was sitting or standing up. The little boy was in constant motion. She wanted to wait until he turns six years old when his brain reaches more development.

In the meantime, she suggests Carlos gets occupational therapy help in order to aid his schooling. Two to three times per week, she recommends. After three months of OT (occupational therapy) she would like to see him again, this time in her St. Lukes clinic.

Doctor also said she will email some recommendations for Carlos' school, which may include pairing Carlos with a role model, sitting him at the front.

Occupational Therapy in QC

1. Capitol Medical Center - Before session starts, Carlos need to be seen by a rehabilitation therapist first Telephone 372-3825 local 2106 P450/session
2. Child Therapy Center - Rm 1001 The One Executive Condo 5 West Ave, QC Telephone 502-4299 or 0917-843-8385 Teacher Raul P450/session
3. CHIPS - 441-5018 P1,500 initial evaluation P500/session Ms. Juliet

Shopping for a property insurance

Due to reasons beyond our control, our MRI (mortgage redemption insurance) expired. Our current address is under mortgage and we greatly feel the need to get an insurance for this. My contacts do not know anyone offering this so I did a research on my own.

1. BPI/MS Insurance Corporation
   Website: http://www.bpims.com/index.asp
   Product: Home Care Advantage
   Contact: Head Office
   11th, 14th &16th Floors Ayala Life-FGU Center
   6811 Ayala Avenue Makati City
   Tel No: (02) 840-9000
2. Malayan Insurance Company
   Website: http://mico.malayan.com/
   Product: Home Protect - offers alternative accommodation for P5,000/day for 15 days; typhoon and flood assistance,
   Contact: Customer Service 4th Floor Y Tower I
   484 Quintin Paredes St.
   Binondo, Manila
   Tel. No.: (632) 243-10-33
   Tel. No.: (632) 242-88-88 (Trunk Line)
   
3. Mapfre Insular Insurance Corporation
   Website: http://www.mapfreinsular.com/
   Product: La Casa - Comes in two packages, Simple or Completo
   Contact: Mapfre Insular Corporate Center
   Acacia Ave., Madrigal Business Park
   Ayala Alabang, Muntinlupa City 1770
   Philippines
   Tel: (632) 8764444
   Fax: (632) 8764344
   Email: callcenter@mapfreinsular.com
   
4. Standard Insurance Co., Inc.
   Website: http://www.mapfreinsular.com/
   Product: Fire and Allied Perils Insurance
   Contact: 28th Floor Petron MegaPlaza Building
   358 Sen. Gil Puyat Avenue, Makati City
   Philippines 1200
   Telephone : +(632) 885-9999
   Fax. No. : +(632) 750-0384
   E-mail:inquiry@standard-insurance.com
   
5. Charter Ping An
   Website: http://philcharter.com.ph/
   Product: Home Security
   Contact: Exclusive Hotline No. 886-6360

So far, only Mapfre Insurance has given me a quotation. I emailed back with a few questions but no reply. Telephone is still the more preferred business correspondence mode.

Which events and people will you remember 2011 for? 5-minute Bible stories for kids, Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook and Recipe for successful achievements

2011 has been a colorful and eventful year.



I would summarize it to be a landmark year when it comes to web development - my work. With the release of Apple's iPad 2, tablet and mobile use has spiked so incredibly that web designers and developers have gone BUSY. Personally, I started with developing ecommerce sites and that's AWESOME.

In terms of personalities, names like Steve Jobs Kim Jong-Il, Prince William and Catherine Middleton made the year that has been emotionally stirring. Even causing others to ask soul-probing questions about life and love.

Politically, the freedom riots in the Middle East are changing how the world works. It's getting flatter by the day.

Lastly, 2011 has been full of global weirding tragedies which claimed lots of innocent lives. The Japan tsunami, Thailand flooding, and Sendong typhoon showed men's feebleness vs nature's wrath. These same events, however, highlighted men's ability to be bigger than himself when he chooses to serve others before his own needs.


Closer note
We have adopted a Tuesday and Thursday family activity of singing hymns, praying and reading Bible stories. The two kids love it! They want to do it daily.

The goal was to enforce family devotion, and provide parent-guided communication about God and faith. It was heart warming to get this Bible passage in one of my devotionals:

1 Corinthians 3:7 NLT
"It’s not important who does the planting, or who does the watering. What’s important is that God makes the seed grow."

Our two kids were gifts from God, and He himself will watch over them and raise them up in a way that will please Him. Praise be to God!


Book trivia

This year, I finished reading The Worst-Case Scenario Survival Handbook, a gift to my husband from dear friends.

Here are cool tips I got from there:

• Bees moving in large masses are called swarms.
• To survive a stampede, determine first where they are headed and then get out of the way. If you cannot escape your only option is to run alongside the stampede to avoid getting trampled.

From the email, tumblr and twitter world

I confess, I love reading heartwarming and inspiring literature. And I get that a lot from my email inbox, tumblr and twitter accounts. Facebook too. Sharing with you one of my 2011 favorites:

The recipe for successful achievements:

1. Enjoy your work.

2. Do your best.

3. Develop good working relationships.

4. Be open to opportunities.

Happy New Year!

Sick kids, women's purse, Shamcey Supsup, Preschool conclusion

Sick kids are the most difficult to take care of.

Recently, Carlos fell from the stairs while rushing down with his sister. They were racing. He skipped a step and fell head first. Good thing I caught him before he landed on the bottom most part. However, the incident broke his left shoulder, clavicle, the doctors call.

Good thing they were on a semestral break.

Days after this, he and his sister developed cough which I think turned into bronchitis. Health is indeed wealth.

Germs trivia
What a shock to read about women's purse as homes to E. coli and salmonella as well as fecal contaminants! Think about it, while using the rest room, there are times when there's no choice but to lay bags and purse on the ladies' room floor. Aside from this, our bags are with us on the train, the bus, the restaurant.

To prevent these germs from getting into our homes, wipe it clean every day with sanitizer. Yes, alcohol's a good choice, if you think your bag's surface won't get damaged with it. Cleaning your bags regularly help too.

Plus, wiping clean regularly used purse items like keys and mobile phones may keep germ-caused diseases away.

Source: Family Education

Shamcey Supsup

Shamcey Supsup made the Philippines proud last September when she bagged the 3rd runner up slot in the Miss Universe 2011. Last year, Philippines' candidate Venus Raj ranked 4th runner up.

While she was doing the pageant, me and the kids were headed for the LBC bankruptcy forum for depositors. Haven't heard from the bank nor PDIC again.

I was impressed with her brief yet intelligent answer about shifting religion for a man and am reminded by a quote by Maya Angelou:

 A woman's heart should be so hidden in Christ that a man should have to seek Him first to find her.

• Shamcey is from General Santos, the home town of now legislator world class boxing champ Manny Pacquiao
• She graduated Magna Cum Laude in the University of the Philippines in Diliman under the College of Architecture, a 5-year course with a professional examination board exam. That means her general weighted average during her whole college life is 1.45 or higher. That's like getting a grade of 90+ (out or 100) in all her classes.
• She topped the Philippine Architectural Board Examination with a grade of 86.60%. Heard that she enrolled in a review center twice, and has a habit of re-reading textbooks several times over. Now that's a habit I want my kids to adopt!
• She was a consistent honor student, valedictorian in grade school and salutatorian in Makati High School.
• Her gym instructor commends her discipline. While training for the Miss Universe, she has to get fit to gain the 'right' abs. There would be times when exercising would be too difficult, but when she was reminded that she will represent the country, she gets motivated. She eats healthy too.
• She attends Victory Christian Fellowship.

Lois' conclusions

At the end of her Nursery 2 class, my eldest's class was told by their teacher that three among them will transfer to another class. Therefore, they will not be their classmates anymore.

During their school's break, we decided to enroll her to a Vacation Bible Class, which is like an extended Sunday School. She had her new teachers and classmates. She liked it, but not as much as regular school, she told me.

At the same time, we enrolled her brother to an orientation class in her regular school because he is a new student. He has to be familiar with a class' routine before the start of the official school year.

Due to this, Lois told me a conclusion she arrived at. "Mom, I won't be attending regular school anymore. I am one of the three students that teacher said will be transferred to another class." She was referring to the Vacation Bible Class as the 'other' class.

Creative lunchboxes, Lois Billionaire, No toothbrush near the toilet, stressed parent equals stressed kids

My two kids are not great eaters. Our family is not. So it's really a gift for me that their school encourages healthy eating - fruits and vegetables. Sometimes I get reprimanded by my own daughter. "Ayayay, Mommy! This is not healthy food."


Lunchbox staples
So I normally pack cut fruits - apple, mangoes, melon, watermelon. Bananas and grapes are sure winners.


I also serve them raw cashew nuts/peanuts mixed with raisins and cereals. On some days, they get peanut butter sandwiches shaped in triangles, ovals, squares and hearts. They love it!

I want to be a billionaire

To encourage doing things on their own, I started posting chore charts for my two kids. The reward was money. Since they love APPS, they may use their money to buy. I was particularly targeting my little boy to do this.

However, my plan backfired. My son was not at all interested in his chores nor his prizes. Instead, it was his sister who religiously checked and asked for her rewards. She was able to get quite a few, almost halfway her piggy bank, until she told me one day: "Don't give me anymore coins. I'm already a billionaire!"

Secretly giggling to her declaration, I confirmed if she knows what a billionaire is. "My classmate Edward said a billionaire is someone who has lots of money."

Yes, my little girl! You are indeed a billionaire.

Restroom tip

I first heard about this while riding the metro train to a meeting.

Flushing the toilet can cause germs to fly anywhere from 6-10 feet. At the very least, keep your brush as far from the toilet as possible, and protect it in a plastic container or holder.

Since we don't have the luxury of space, I have instructed everyone to pull down the lid before hitting the flush button. Hope that helps?

Child stress

My kids copy me, especially my bad traits. I am working hard on it. Though I haven't gotten very far. Lately though, when I read about the top causes of stress for children, I got a solid punch. I should really pull myself together when the kids are watching.

Parent having problems.
Fight with a friend or a sibling.
Taking a test.
Wondering if someone thinks you're attractive (teens especially).
Not having enough privacy.
Birth of a brother or sister.
Moving to a new school.
Re/marriage of a parent.
Not having enough money.
A teacher who doesn't like you.

Source: Mind/Body Medical Institute

Thinking of mommy, trouble with sending son to school, sardines and chocolate beddings, door made from color swatches

While washing the dishes, my little girl pointed out that her utensils need not be cleaned. "I didn't use them mom, because I don't want you to be tired. When I was in Laguna, I missed you."

Yes, absence makes the heart grow fonder. I'm so proud of how my 5-year old girl thought about me. Thank you for being selfless, Lois!

Children listen
Careful what you say, children will listen - that song of Miss Barbara Streissand has never been truer than this time.

I talked on the phone about my little boy's lackluster efforts and interests in writing and the following day. My sister was on the other line. The following morning, my three-your old son uses that as the reason not to go inside their classroom.

"I cannot draw and write", he argues.

"That's the more reason you should go to school", I argued back.

Fast forward when we are at his school grounds, the bell rings for them to line up. With all his classmates falling in line, he fiddles behind my back. "I want them inside already, and then I will go and line up."

No one's left outside anymore. Teacher beckons to him again. He resists, as if finding protection from me. "Go inside when you're ready. We are waiting for you inside." He was told by the teacher.

He refuses, again. I try more convincing tactics - bribing, threatening, encouraging. Carlos doesn't want to go inside. I turn my back to walk back home. He follows. When we got to a private place where I can talk with him, I remind him that when we get home I will bring him to his room and talk with him - the usual punishment routine. He speaks some illogical words, but motions to go to school.

I walk with him again. When we get to his class' door, he tells me to knock. We wait. Growing impatient perhaps, he knocks now. Teacher opens the door and greets him the usual morning ritual. He gets inside. Hay!

This seemingly ordinary shoe may be zipped up on its own - swell for light travelers.

Loving school
Quite the opposite, my 5-year old daughter tells me one time that her favorite thing to do is to go to school.

"I love learning," she beams.

Good for you. She notes that job helpers, when teacher lets them report the weather, read the calendar, etc entice her to go to school every day.

This door is made from pantone switches which lets the light in.

No yaya again and again

Alam mong DAPAT nang maglinis kung may hinanap ka sa asawa mo at ang sagot nya ay, "Asawa lang ako, 'di ako manghuhula." (You know you really have to clean up when you ask your spouse for something and he blurts out: "I'm just your spouse, I'm not a fortune-teller.")

Our resolve has been tested, and we failed. Again.

Flash back to year 2010, I told myself prayerfully that it will be a no-nanny lifestyle for us. However, I was tempted with the offer from the long-time house help from my husband's side. She has ten kids, and she wants the 7/10, a 13-year old girl, to be our nanny. All of her older daughters are married now. They started the family life in a very young age. Not attending school, they chose to start their own families instead. Yet, they still depend on her.

We wanted to help, that's why we agreed. A month after though, our young nanny was on her way back home. She missed home so much. I think it goes both ways. Her family misses her too?

Plus, our house has been set up in such a way that it really is boring to a typical Filipino teenager. We don't have TV or cable subscription. We work from home. We don't go out much. It wouldn't be so nice to have your boss behind your back all the time?

Coincidentally too, I have been really busy that I am not able to help her with a lot of the house chores and kid responsibilities. So I guess it really is that way for us. Shoe box living by ourselves.

Love your enemies, for they tell you your faults. 

-Benjamin Franklin

I checked on my kids about their reaction towards this new but familiar set up. My eldest, turned 5 years old three months ago, admitted she prefers having a helper. "It's nice," she said.

I admit. It really is more comfortable. The voice activated service that nannies and house helps provide make life easier. I can always delegate the things I don't want to do, or the things that don't require much high level thinking. That's not a luxury we can afford anymore. We're particular with strangers living with us, and we have exhausted both sides of our families connections of probable yayas.

I choose my friends for their good looks, my acquaintances for their good characters, and my enemies for their intellects. A man cannot be too careful in the choice of his enemies. 

- Oscar Wilde

It's not only me who has decided to go nanny-free. My neighbors did too. Though it seems that they're already looking for replacements. Their works don't allow them to be with their kids.

There are several things that I have noticed about the relationships between amo (boss) and yayas (nannies) do not prosper if the boss stays at home. Plus, if the boss thinks of the nanny as dispensable, it'll be very short-lived.

There have been televised stories of nannies stealing from their boss. Or even kidnapping the kids. I have friends who share these twists. They have vowed to not go the nanny way as long as they can.

It really is tricky. Yet my dream is that one day, Filipino families will not require this set up. Families will send their kids to school. Children will finish their schooling. No need to work as stay-home helpers, worse, go abroad to be nannies.

Words are like elevators. They either bring people up, or down, or nowhere.

Parenting is NOW my Main Thing

I heard it said again and again, parenting is no joke. Now that our kids are 2- and 4-years old, I agree absolutely.

Gone are the days when they are all a bundle of joy. I now have little people who have their own preferences and willing to battle with me over them. Yes, they still are sweet and clingy - as if I, and my husband, are their world - but slowly they have been becoming their own persons. So the journey gets trickier.

No quitting
Late at night, laying sweetly in bed, a little voice whimpers, "Dede please, no. 2." I turn to my resting husband and lovingly whispers, "Ok, quiet now. I will prepare your milk."

I stand up and go to the table where I have brought baby bottles and milk formula for mixing, anticipating this moment. I hand the bottle to the hungry sleeper and lay down myself. Deep in sleep, I feel a thug. "Mommy, dede please." If I let it go, the request will just grow louder which could end to the whole neighborhood waking up to crying babies.

No, I am not complaining. This job, parenting, has no end - even at the wee hours of the evening. There's no quitting either. It's tough because it's inconvenient at times.

Required improvement
"It's packing away time," I tell my kids who have moved on from playing toys to tinkering with their iPod games.

"I'm just checking my plants. Mabubulok na kase," my kid argues.

Aargh! That is my original line when excusing myself for extended minutes of playing computer games. How can I argue against the same legit reasons I gave? So I ended up cleaning up, with the lesson to grow up myself.

My kids can never be energetic if I am sluggish, or friendly if I were a snob. They model the behavior they sees, most of the time, and very embarrassing, they choose the negative ones to mimic.

Unless they are successful
During one conversation with Daddy Paul, he said, "I'm more willing to take the back seat just so they could shine." Not that I agree with it completely, I still want him to soar as he attempt great things. I am with him absolutely that we would like our kids to be better than us, and so on. I would like our family to be improving down the line, and that would depend largely on how we would spend our days now.

Appreciated past
That's why I look up to parents who have produced great children. Almost like collating a best practices book of raising kids. I know my parents couldn't have done it without the assistance and influence of our Lola Ine. Even to this day, I look back at the probinsya-way of disciplined, simple and uncomplicated way of life.

My husband and I are set to be the best parents we can be to our kids. Good luck to us.

A trip to Laguna

It has been an annual tradition to spend Holy Week at Lobo Beach in Batangas, Daddy Paul's side of the family. Now that Lois is four-years old, she is excited to go to the beach. I could almost use it as a power controler over her. "If you don't pack away those toys, you will not join us to Lobo." It would definitely work.

But a parenting book Daddy Paul and I are reading suggests the other way. Say it once, walk away, follow through. I've tried it twice with Lois and result is a po-answering kid. The book works! And I haven't finished it yet.


The book, entitled Have a New Kid by Friday, however, is not for the weakling. It meant really sticking to the punishment you will give. The first thing I used with Lois was to deny her milk from her bottle. Yes, I was willing to let her go on a fast - because she was obviously hurting other people. She would intentionally hit his Kuya Doods, my nephew and sole employee, then say sorry after I reprimand her.

When I saw her hitting him again, I confronted the behavior. With my most serious face, I brought her to our 'punishment room' and told her she cannot have milk because she constantly hits Kuya Doods. I labeled what I was doing with her. "You're given a punishment because you keep on doing what is wrong, hitting Kuya Doods. It is bad to hurt people. And you don't say sorry then keep on repeating the same thing."

I've to admit it was hard. It required that I deal with Lois completely, all my attention to her. Then, given the punishment, I had to be tough. Giving in to her whines and cries would break the spell. In our case, Lois constantly bogged me for her milk, but I reminded her she cannot have her usual bottle until it was bedtime.

I guess this incident showed Lois who was in charge? Or perhaps, since I was firm, she learned Mommy Tams would really do what she said? Whatever reason, I am happier with Lois. She has become a more respectful daughter, and a responsible sister - at age 4.

Meeting Baby Skid
Before heading to Lobo, Batangas, we passed by Binan to finally meet and welcome the newest addition to the Guevara clan - Baby Skid, Kuya Bong and Ate Alyn's most precious firstborn.

It was amusing to find Baby Skid on top of the table. With his rocker cradle strapped to the chairs, week-old Skid was fast asleep very unmindful of us. Well, that's what newborn babies do a lot. He was covered, almost from head to foot and Mommy Tams took to removing his clothes, checking on him, perhaps too, reminiscing on the good old days when Lois and Carlos were like that. It was amusing that little Baby Skid was smiling. Whether it was gas or pure bliss, it was heartwarming to see him beam.

The kids, with the dad and Ma Dahls were checking the almost garden paradise which Skid would now call home. Shady trees, beautiful flowering plants, chirping birds, barking dogs plus huge turtles and tilapias all inside their compound. Inside too was the Coke room, where Kuya Bong and Ate Alyn display their humongous Coke memorabilia collection.

We're excited to have Baby Skid grow up. I'm sure the kids would definitely love to play, swim and run with him.

Random Wonder

Lois and Carlos are growing so fast. Last night, while they were sleeping, I looked at them and saw how much space they were taking up on our family bed. The kids are not yet ready to move to their own rooms so we enjoy this chance to snuggle with them every night. :) To me, Lois looked like a 6-year old already.



This afternoon, while we were doing Lois' assignment - a book of Philippine animals they saw during their field trip at Avilon Zoo to be submitted a week after they visited the zoo, I was again amazed by our little girl.

I asked her to color the Philippine map provided by their teacher. She willingly obliged, choosing the color blue for the island of Luzon, yellow for Visayas and red for Mindanao. The amazing part, she knew the whole Luzon collection of islands! Palawan and the Bicol Region were shaded blue. She even told me that Bicol is where we can find the butanding or the whale shark, largest fish.

I was really fascinated that our little girl is learning in school, she's paying attention and she's absorbing the lessons she hears. Daddy Paul said that Lois once remarked about an anecdote we heard and shared with others - Winnie the Pooh speaking Visayan in Hongkong Disneyland.

On Children
Kahlil Gibran

Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.

You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow,
which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them,
but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.

You are the bows from which your children
as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite,
and He bends you with His might
that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let your bending in the archer's hand be for gladness;
For even as He loves the arrow that flies,
so He loves also the bow that is stable.

December 2009 in Photos

Christmas is more meaningful and special this year, now that both kids are bigger. Lois is a preschooler, and Carlos is a toddler. Quite some talkers. Here are things we conquered December 2009.

Ate Aliyah looking after the buffet table with the mermaid doll

Cousins too - Moi and Raymart. It's great that they are batchmates, my pamangkins.

Newest addition to our BIG family, baby Samantha Angela, named after Lola sa tuhod, Ine. Ren ren is big bro now.

No hearts

Day after Christmas, Lois and Carlos were playing with their new stuff toys- gifts they received from family and friends. Lois, with urgency in her tone, told me "Mommy, kawawa naman sila."

Taking the chance to impart life lessons, I told her that as long as God is in our hearts, nobody is to be pitied.

Then Lois quickly replied, "Wala kase silang hearts kase toys lang sila e." (They don't have hearts because they are only toys.)

Oops!

Welcome to the Christian World, Baby Thym Viezhan

Last December 19, in behalf of my sister who's based in USA, I went to the baby dedication of Thym Viezhan. He's the first baby of Mich Villa, who's been married to another Victory Christian Fellowship member. I don't know much of the details since I left VCF late 2002, as I found Bread of Life a more suitable church for me. Nonetheless, I owe a lot of my basic Christianity lessons from VCF Recto, through the cell group of Mich, who's with VCF Recto, introduced by my sister. I was even water baptized there.



I've accepted Christ into my life as early as high school, through my sister again, but the encounter wasn't life changing. It took almost eight years before I really had a surrendered life - and that was when things became different. I could say I even forgot about Christ in my life, until that time. I was in a crossroad. I hurt someone whom I thought I loved so dearly, and this rocked my world. The very core of who I am grew gray. So I started questioning the meaning of life. How could I say I love someone, and then just stop loving him? How come I cannot plan my life? How is it that even if I get what I longed for, I still am not happy?


Maybe my sister saw my searchings, because she invited me to one of the Sunday services of VCF, and even at the start, I was already crying. I couldn't remember the song that the congregation was singing, it was new to me. But it spoke of God's love and sovereignty over our lives and it felt so good to my incomplete soul. My sister knew all along the truth of life, because she had met the Author of it and introduced me once again to a life of knowing God and trusting in Him.

Almost five years since then and I'd say that I'm still learning a lot. But it's just so good to rest on God's grace, and live life with Him in charge. Life has a meaning and purpose, and this is revealed every day.

Anyways, going back to Mich's child, he was named such because she dreamt of the name Timothy. She said when she had this dream, she felt so sure that she's carrying a boy, and that it would all be fine. She came from a miscarriage, and because of her age and the schedule of her husband, he works abroad for the UN and goes out of the country regularly - it was hard for her to have a baby already.


Viezhan, came from the combinations of Bible heroes David, Ezra and Hannaniah.

It was good to see them again, my former family, so to speak. Coming from a different perspective now, I cherish what I have learned from them and am eager for the things to come.

May your life be lived in daily amazement of God's handiwork Thym! God bless your family Mich!

Mid-year Milestones

It's already half-way of 2009. I couldn't say that it has been so far, so good. I really feel like things are going too fast for me. The hours of a day are not enough for the things to be done, so I end up with this long list of carry over to-do's.

Meridian parents
But major accomplishments include having moved to our long-term residence here in Quezon City. Lois has just finished her summer orientation classes with Meridian International Learning Experience. She's an incoming preschooler. At the end of the class, her teachers talked to Paul and me. They said Lois has caught up with the routine of the class. Her being one of the oldest in the group shows, she silently holds the hand of her crying classmate. She has adjusted well. She talks with her teachers, showing to them her lovely dress. They described her as the gentle kind. Well, I'm fine with that.

Fitness buffs
And, another milestone, having enrolled at a gym near our place for wellness management. Yup, Paul and I are serious about living strong until the end. We've been gym regulars since Saturday. Doing cardio exercises and lifting weights. Monitoring what we eat and drinking milk. What I like about the gym is that it's population is just right. I don't know if it's because we go there during off-peak hours which is morning. So far, I've spotted several ABS-CBN 2 talents already, not that it matters, but maybe the place is really not so packed that's why celebrities prefer it over other facilities in the area.

So far, we're doing what Ms. Xhi, our trainer, listed us to do. The machines to use, number of reps and weights plus the diet. I guess though, we are failing at the diet. The plan says three glasses of milk and five servings of protein. My estimate is that I'm under consuming. This morning, one guy trainer there said it's best to not drop the weights of the machines. Maximum muscle workout is achieved when you continue to do your reps while holding the weights. I tried it and it's much harder. Wasn't able to do minimum repetitions for the arm lifts at 10lbs, but for the other workouts, was able to finish up to the second sets with much higher weights. Hehe!

Web newbie
On the hunt for the best commercial biz location for us, and it seems like the Lord has delivered once again. On my way home, I saw this row of small stores with one unit unoccupied. I inquired and found out the place is for rent. Fee is very much within the target budget we've allotted. Area is promising, best among all I've seen. Will submit the proposal tomorrow along with the processing fee. In about two weeks, we can start fixing the place and then, we're off to business.

form> function() & .class
Now that topic is business, let me announce the first Philippine web design conference. I've signed up and am hoping to win free tickets, that's a P1000 thing, that's why this announcement. I've visited the web site of the group who's hosting it, Philippine Web Designers Organization, and it looks promising. I hope the Philippines can become great at web design, and this is a good start.

Save the date, July 10 8am to 5pm at the Asian Institute of Management across Greenbelt 1 in Makati. Benefit from the genius of Rico Sta. Cruz - Creative Director, U.S. Auto Parts Philippines; Nap Lara - Software Developer, Friendster; Regnard Raquedan - Web & Usability Consultant; Jojo Esposa - Founder, Philippine Web Accessibility Group; Marco Palinar - User Interface/Web Design Consultant; Gail dela Cruz-Villanueva - Creative Director, Sheero Media; Luis Buenaventura II - Co-founder and Social Software Architect, Syndeo Labs; Director of Engineering, Exist Global. Honestly, have no idea who these people are but you can always google their credentials, right?

Schedule of activities on July 10 is:

* 08:00am-08:45am - Registration
* 08:45am-09:00am - Opening Remarks and Introduction to PWDO by Sophia Lucero
* 09:00am-09:45am - Design 101 by Rico Sta. Cruz
* 10:00am-10:45am - Interaction Design by Nap Lara
* 11:00am-11:45am - Web Standards, Accessibility, & Usability by Regnard Raquedan
* 12:00nn-12:45pm - Lunch
* 12:45pm-01:15pm - Disabled Friendly Awards by Jojo Esposa
* 01:15pm-02:00pm - Sponsor Talks
o Search-friendly Web Pages by Aileen Apolo of Google
* 02:00pm-02:45pm - Workflow by Marco Palinar
* 03:00pm-03:45pm - Industry Tips by Gail dela Cruz-Villanueva
* 04:00pm-04:45pm - State of the Web by Luis Buenaventura II
* 04:45pm-05:15pm - Panel Q&A

The event is still open for sponsors, if interested click here. Around 400 attendees are expected, and you could be one of them. Or like me, you can also earn your way in through the free ticket promo.

March 2009 In Photos

Foreman Bong at our soon to be finished condo unit

Lola Inang with camera-shy guests

Senior Citizen all

Birthday girl ML - Mam Lorna :)



Playing with macaronis